What High Net Worth Clients Actually Value: Beyond the Wealth Stereotypes
You could be losing affluent clients to competitors who understand something you don't. And it has nothing to do with returns, fees, or your fancy office.
Before you schedule another client appreciation dinner or redesign your pitch deck, try this: The Affluent Values Compass. It's a three-question diagnostic I developed after looking at values data on high-net-worth individuals across multiple continents. Takes two minutes. Will change how you approach every wealthy client relationship you have. I'll give you the questions at the end of this post, but first, let me show you why you need them.
The Stereotype That's Costing You, Clients
Here's what most financial advisors assume about wealthy clients: they care about Wealth. About Money. About maximizing returns, minimizing taxes, and making the number go up.
Reasonable assumption, right? They're wealthy. Wealth must be what they value.
Except it isn't. Not even close.
When we analyze affluent individuals through the Valuegraphics Database, real data, not assumptions, the results are genuinely surprising. Wealth as a value ranks 38th out of 56 globally. Money ranks 52nd. These are near the bottom of the list.
Now, obviously, wealthy people care about their wealth. But caring about something and valuing it are different things. You care about your car's oil level, but it's not one of your core values. It's maintenance. It's table stakes.
The advisors who keep losing clients to competitors are the ones who keep talking about oil levels to people who want to talk about where they're driving.
What the Data Actually Shows
A 2023 study from Cerulli Associates found that 70% of heirs switch advisors after inheriting wealth. Seventy percent. That's not a leak. That's a flood.
The standard explanation is that the next generation wants something "different." Which is true but useless. Different how? Different in what way?
The Valuegraphics data tells us exactly how.
When we profile affluent individuals, and I mean actually profile their values, not just their demographics or their investable assets, we see the same handful of values showing up at the top of the list, over and over.
Family (ranked 1st globally) shows up even more strongly in high-net-worth profiles than in the general population. Not surprising. But here's what is surprising: the definition of Family is shifting. It's not just spouse and kids anymore. It's chosen family. It's a legacy beyond bloodlines. It's "the people I've decided matter to me."
Belonging (ranked 4th) appears constantly. Wealthy people are often isolated by their wealth. They can't talk openly about money with most of their friends. They're suspicious of new relationships. They crave spaces where they fit in without having to perform or protect themselves.
Personal Growth (ranked 6th) dominates. These are people who got where they are by getting better at things. That drive doesn't stop when the bank account crosses a certain threshold. If anything, it intensifies. They want advisors who help them grow, not just advisors who help them preserve.
Loyalty (ranked 7th) cuts both ways. When you have it, you have it for decades. When you don't, they're gone in a quarter. Loyalty isn't given freely to institutions. It's granted to individuals who earn it.
Notice what's missing from this list? Status. Possessions. Authority. All the things the wealth management industry assumes drive wealthy clients.
The Affluent Values Compass: Three Questions
Here's the tool I promised. Three questions to ask yourself about any high-net-worth client relationship, existing or prospective.
Question One: Who is their Family, and do they know you know?
Not their family tree. Their Family. The people who matter most. This might include their actual relatives, but it might also include a business partner, a childhood friend, or a philanthropic cause they've adopted. If you don't know who's in this circle, you're not in it either.
Question Two: Where do they belong, and have you helped them belong anywhere?
What communities, formal or informal, give them a sense of fitting in? What rooms do they walk into where they don't have to pretend? If you've never introduced them to someone, invited them somewhere, or connected them to something that made them feel less alone in their wealth, you're a vendor. Not an advisor.
Question Three: What's the next version of themselves they're trying to become?
Personal Growth doesn't stop at a net worth number. What are they trying to learn? What challenge are they working through? What would make them proud of themselves in five years? If your conversations never touch this territory, someone else's will.
The Affluent Values Compass: Three Questions
When you start engaging affluent clients at the values level, something weird happens. The conversations change. The questions they ask you change. The way they introduce you to other people changes.
You stop being the person who manages their money and start being the person who understands them. That's not a semantic difference. It's a retention strategy. It's a referral strategy. It's a differentiation strategy in a market where everyone has access to the same products, the same platforms, and the same performance benchmarks.
The advisors I work with at conferences, at firms, and in workshops tell me the same thing after they start using valuegraphic thinking: "I wish I'd known this twenty years ago." The clients they thought they knew, they didn't really know. The clients they were about to lose, they kept. The clients they thought were out of reach suddenly weren't.
The wealth management industry is obsessed with assets under management. Fair enough. But AUM follows trust. Trust follows understanding. And understanding starts with knowing what someone actually values.
The data exists. The patterns are clear. The question is whether you're willing to ask different questions.
Try the Affluent Values Compass this week. Pick one client. Run through the three questions. Notice what you don't know.
That gap is where your competitors are already standing.
Remember: if you know what people value, you can change what happens next.
Download free tools, data, and reports at www.davidallisoninc.com/resources
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